a day without ramen
by used2bcool
Summary: Naruto goes a day without ramen and gets in some interest situations. funny moments. Warings:adult language, drug and alcohol use, adult content. my first fic! please review!
1. a big problem

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto

**Warning: **adult language, drug/alcohol use, Crack! and adult content.

ok... this is my first fan fiction, so don't be to hard on me. I really hope you like it!

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The 16-year-old blonde yawned as he slowly got out of bed. He walked to the kitchen as if he was a zombie. Naruto was craving the only thing he ever does crave...ramen! Opening the cupboard he quickly notice it was empty. He was suddenly wide awake.

"Shit, I'm out of ramen," he cursed to himself. "I'll just go to Ichiraku," Naruto put on in his usually outfit, fixed his hair and brushed his teeth and he was out the door. When he got to Ichiraku, he noticed it was still closed and the there was a sing on the front that read: _'Went on vacation! be back tomorrow morning! p.s. sorry Naruto..._'

"No..." he said as if a friend just died."NNOOO! there is no fucking way this is happening right now! I don't have any money to buy other ramen, all I had was Ichiraku coupons!" he screamed at the ramen stand.

"What are you doing Naruto?" asked his silver haired teacher. Naruto looked up and glared at Kakashi.

"What the hell do you think smartass? I'm gonna have to go a whole fucking day with out ramen. Do you know what fucking happens to me when I don't eat ramen?" he said in a quick bitchy tone.

"No I don't, but I do know that you can't live off of ramen forever and is one day so bad? You should be eating vegetables anyway " he said crossing his arms. As Kakashi looked at Naruto, he noticed his face was turning red and was greeting his teeth. _'I hope he isn't too mad_' he thought to himself.

Naruto did not like this at all."Fuck you, you think you know everything you bastard!" He lifted his fist and rased his middle finger. "Use you freaky eye on this!" Kakashi was suprized at Naruto's reaction. Just when he was about to respond to the fox boy, he was gone.

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The blonde was running to the training fields to take some anger out on some training poles, when he slammed into someone. He and the other person hit the ground as if they just got kicked by a horse.

"Ah shit! you could have killed Akamaru you filthy fuck!" Kiba yelled as he petted his beloved dog. Over the years Akamaru has grown to where he cannot be picked up anymore .Naruto and Kiba stood up hissing at the new pain flowing through there bodies.

"Why the hell are you standing here for?" Naruto said in a bitchy tone as he rubbed his lower back trying to mend the pain.

"Is there a problem with me standing outside my house to give Akamaru a bathroom break? And why are all bitchy? You should at least say your fucking sorry for running into me like that, that fucking hurt you fuckass!"

"I'm gonna have to go one fucking day without ramen! I don't know what I'm gonna do! And you shouldn't have been standing there in the first place you bastard! "

"Well, you could try to get addicted to something else, it would at least calm you down for a bit," Kiba suggested.

"Like what? There's no other food I like! waah! I hate this!" he said like he was a little girl who just got her favorite candy stolen. He looked up at Kina who had a smirk on his face.

Kiba laughed "I wasn't talking about food" Naruto was suddenly interested. He rased an eyebrow and continued to listen "I'm talking about drugs,"

"What kind of drugs?" Naruto was a bit confused. _'What would drugs do for me?_' he thought to himself.

"Well, there's all kind of drugs out there, Iv got some weed if your interested..."he offered. Naruto scratched his chin.

"Hmm..." _'well it would get my mind off this whole "no ramen for a day" thing..._'

**To be continued! **

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I hope you like it so far! I'll try my best to put up a new chapter ASAP. Please review!


	2. fuel to the fire

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto

**Warnings:**adult language, drug and alcohol use, Crack! and adult content.

The story continues! and please, read the warning, I put it there for a reason. Any who... on with the story!

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"Your sure this is ok? I was always told by Iruka-sensei to stay away from drugs," Naruto whined as he looked up at Kiba.

"Your not a kid anymore! you're a fucking ninja! you can make your own choices!" Kiba ranted on. "Besides I know you want to deep down..." he put a smile on his face and roughly put his arm over Naruto's shoulder. "What do ya say?"

"Well...alright...I'll smoke some weed," he said unsure of himself. Kiba smirked and led Naruto inside his house. As he walked in the house, he was welcomed by a faint smell of weed mixed with strong a dog odor. The entry way lead directly into the living room. Naruto followed Kiba into the living room. Kiba sat on a worn blue sofa. Naruto sat at a comfortable distance from Kiba. Kiba reached his hand down towards the discolored brown carpet and under the sofa. When his hand appeared again he was holding a zip-lock bag filled with the toxic plant he put it on the wooden coffee table in front of him. Within the bag Naruto could see some pre-rolled dubs. Kiba took out two dubs and gave one to Naruto. Naruto began to feel nervous, _shit...I feel like Sasuke's Chidori is in my stomach._ Kiba put his hand in his pocket and fished out his lighter, then put the dub to his mouth and lit the tip of the dub. He breathed in the smoke and a very relax

expression was earned on his face. _It doesn't look so bad..._

"Your turn..." Kiba said as he passed Naruto the lighter. Naruto held it in his hands unsure of what to do.

"Umm...Iv never done this before..."He said in a very innocent voice.

"How cute," Kiba said with sarcasm. "Here I'll help you out..." with that Kiba snatch the lighter back from Naruto. "Put this between your lips," Kiba took a huff of his dub before continuing. Naruto was nervous yet managed an 'okay' and he put the dub between his lips. Kiba put the lighter up to Naruto's dub. "Breath in as I light it alright?" Naruto's only response was a 'mmhmm' Naruto did just as Kiba told him too. As Naruto breathed in the smoke he could feel all the nervousness wash away. He felt like there was nothing wrong in the world. Unfortunately, this feeling was short lived. Soon as he exhaled he began to cough rapidly. "Don't worry...you'll get used to it after a while..." Naruto looked at Kiba, _that wasn't so bad_. With that, Naruto put the dub to his lips for a second huff.

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An hour later, both Naruto and Kiba were laying on the floor looking at the ceiling with an empty zip-lock bag beside them. Both had blood shoot eyes and grins on there faces.

"...so he like...raped you?"the dog boy asked in a mono tone voice.

"No...we were in the bath house and it was three AM and got a bloody nose and was talking about weird stuff," he explained in the same mono tone.

"Like what?"

"Something about friendship and uhhh, something else important...the whole time he was looking at my body all weird,"

"Sasuke's gay!" the dog boy shouted out.

"That would be awkward."

"He likes you!" he said as he pointed a finger at the blonde.

"That would be SO cool! He would buy me ramen all the time!" he said as he started to day dream about ramen.

"Thats something only you would say,"

"Dude...I want some food!" Naruto said in a 'surfer way ' Kiba rolled his head to look at Naruto.

"I think you have the munches!" He said as giggled. "I have food in the kitchen..." he said sluggishly. Naruto stood up slowly and wondered around the house until he eventually found the kitchen. He looked in the fridge, it was almost empty. The only thing in it was some brownies on a paper plat wrapped in a clear plastic wrap and random condemns. The fox boy plastered a cheesy grin on his face. He quickly grabbed the paper plat, removed the clear wrap and began inhale as many brownies as he could. Soon, there were no more brownies to eat. The blonde became dizzy yet managed to make his way back the living room.

"All you had were some f-fucking b-brownies! I want more fucking f-food!" Naruto said in a very non-sober way. Kiba looked at him for a while, he began to laugh.

"Those were my special brownies!" Kiba laughed out. Naruto look at him in confusion.

"Huh?" Naruto breathed out. The dog boy rolled over on his belly and rested his head.

"It's alright, go get some food and bring it back here, I'm gonna take a nap," Kiba said with a yawn. Naruto began walking towards the door.

"Okay...I'll be back," he began to laugh hysterically. "I am the govenator!" he yelled. Kiba giggled. Naruto made his way out the door and back to were he ran into Kiba and continued down the road.

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"Naruto? Are you feeling ok?" asked Naruto's dark haired team mate. Sasuke moved closer to Naruto and quickly realized why Naruto was acting so strange. "Oh my God, you reek of weed! What the fuck have you been doing?" Naruto began to walk towards a bar near by. "Where the hell are you going?" Sasuke yelled.

"Thirsty," was all that Naruto said. Sasuke thought to himself '_I should look after him if he's gonna be doing drugs, after all, he did save my life, plus it might be fun to mess with him a bit' _Sasuke waited outside the bar.

The fox boy walked up to the small bar and noticed it was nearly empty. Not even the bar tender was in sight. Naruto looked around, he saw a large man passed out on the bar. He notice his glass was still full. Still feeling thirsty, he stumbled over towards the man. He picked-up the glass and drank it in a few gulps. Naruto's body went numb and his mind became more hazed. Naruto slammed the glass on the bar stumbled out of the bar. Hearing the loud nosie, the man slowly woke-up. He quickly noticed that his drink was gone.

"W-who the hell drank my moonshine?" he mumbled as he drifted back to sleep.

"Naruto!" Sasuke shouted out. "What the hell is wrong with you?" Naruto wrapped his arms around Sasuke. He put his lips to Sasuke's ear.

"I am SOOO fucked up right now," Naruto whispered in his team mate's ear. Sasuke could smell the alcohol on his breath and weed in his hair.'_When did Naruto become like this? I'm gonna knock some sense into him when he sobers up' _

"You can't be out like this! Oh shit, what the hell am I gonna do?" he said as Naruto started to fall asleep on his shoulder. He began to notice that people were giving him weird looks.

"I have to get you out of here," he said to the blonde who was not listening. The dark-haired boy picked-up Naruto bridal style and looked down at him."Don't worry, you'll sober-up soon." With that he started to make his way to the training fields. '_I'm so beating the shit out you latter' _

**To be continued!**

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this one is a bit longer. The next chapter is were the story really starts getting funny. And before people start saying stuff like "Sasuke's not in the hidden leaf village" I just want to say: I know that and it's called fan**fiction** for a reason. Any who, I hope you like my story so far. Please review! Keep in mind this is my first story!


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